Traditional Male/Female Roles Bring the Greatest Happiness and Fulfillemnt in Life for Both Men and Women
"It helps to see heterosexual love as a mystical dance. The male leads; the female follows. You can't have a graceful dance without each partner playing his part."
Editor's Note: I'm happy that Henry Makow continues to pen these wonderful articles illustrating the attributes and inner motivations that allow men and women to live their life in a way that will be most in concert with the Divine plan of creation and bring to them the greatest sense of fulfillment and joy in life. In the earlier half of the 20th century, most children in America, rich or poor, had a loving home with a mother and father there who cared for them and instilled in them, through example, the virtues of morality and character that will serve them throughout life's journey. That was the norm. Today, most children are not raised in a home with both a mom and a dad there to guide and lend their special attributes of learning and understanding (which both boys and girls need from their natural mother and father). In Japan, family life is much more secure and traditional than here in America. As a consequence, most girls and boys in Japan are raised in a loving home environment that once was the norm in America. Yes, divorce is now rising in Japan, largely due to western influence from TV, movies, 'career' propaganda, etc., but it is nowhere near as bad as in the USA.
In modern America, the loss of respect for the gentler sex by young men, and the concurrent loss of self respect by young women, for the magnificent wonderment of beauty, attraction and desire that Nature had endowed them, is mind numbing to witness and even more disturbing to hear. I just saw a 2000 movie about the life of Audrey Hepburn, a magnetic and beautiful woman who simply radiated femininity. The actress who played her, Jennifer Love Hewit, was amazing and transcendent in her portrayal of that lovely and unique creature of God. It was the first movie that I had seen with Jennifer Hewit and I was anxious to see another film with her because I was so impressed with her acting ability in the Hepburn story. So I found a love story on Youtube and I expected to see something heart warming and inspiring, but the movie took a nose dive in the very opening sequence in which the movie's screen writer just had to have the male love interest yell out the word "F***" as loud as possible to express his feelings about mailing a love note to the wife, no less, of his best friend (Hewit). Now, I'm already sighing and saying to myself: "Oh Jesus..." I stick with it anyway, hoping it will get better and advance into something resembling a decent love story. But no such luck. Within the first 5 minutes of the movie, Hewit's character is also using "F***ing" this and "F***ing" that in every other scene, so I just had to hit the stop button. I wasn't going to subject myself to that level of garbage for 90 minutes. What a complete turn off and disappointment to hear the most vulgar words possible in the English language come tumbling out of the mouth of such a good looking and talented woman. I lost all interest right then and there in searching for any other movie that Jennifer "Love" Hewit may appear in. She's just another sellout to the Jewish morality-destroyers who run the Hollywood Decadence Factory and I'm not going to waste time watching her or any other foul mouthed actress.
I couldn't imagine courting a girl who would use foul language and not give it a second thought. Of course, I realize foul language is the norm today in the boy meets girl world, thanks to the imposition of everything that's low and crude into social discourse by our subversive Zio morality busters, but that doesn't make it OK or desirable to go along with that soul destroying vulgarity. Young women. especially, have to retain their own inner standards of morality and not allow themselves to be swept into the gutter. Just think of Audrey Hepburn and the effect she had on millions of people who adored her for her elegant and lady like demeanor. I can't imagine a better example of true femininity and womanly allure. ..Ken Adachi]
By Jenry Makow Ph.D.
February 5, 2016
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This is the first article I wrote for the Internet almost 16 years ago.
It describes how I learned to follow my masculine instincts.
The male is dominant in a heterosexual relationship.
The Cabalists (Satanists) are messing with the fundamental laws of the universe
(yin-yang; active-passive) by promoting female dominance in order
to make us their neutered minions.
When I was 21 years old, and living in Israel, I received a letter from my mother. She had taken my savings and invested in a town house.
"Now, you are a mensch," she said.
I wondered what she meant. How did owning a house make me "a man?"
I came of age at a time when youth was "looking for identity." I was searching for it in Israel. Later, I became a Canadian nationalist. In each case, I didn't find identity in "community."
I had a strong patriarchal father, an excellent role model. He built a successful career, and supported a family.
"Work is the backbone of a man," he would tell me. "It's the most important decision a man makes. A wife is the second."
But for some reason, his example didn't register. Why not?
For centuries, men defined themselves in terms of masculinity. Why was I so clueless?
I took my cues from the mass media. I was a feminist.
ATTACK ON GENDER AND FAMILY
I grew up in an era that bought the feminist lie that men and women are identical. In our culture, women are encouraged to be "equal" -- do everything men do, and vice versa. "Equal" became "identical." This retarded my personal development by 25 years. I doubt if I am alone.
"Identical" made me look for for myself in a mate. I was literally attracted to lithe young women with cropped boyish haircuts: my own persona.
I put a woman on a pedestal because she had my identity. She could give it back to me. Some women were immediately repelled. Others enjoyed the adulation for a while, but eventually lost respect.
What I needed was someone quite different from me, my feminine complement.
Eventually feminism will be recognized for what it is: a virulently anti-social, anti-women, lesbian ideology that achieved power by pretending to champion "women's rights." By taking power, feminism has been able to emasculate men and masculinize women. In other words, women have usurped the masculine identity, and in the process, both sexes have lost their own.
Incredibly, the destruction of heterosexuality is the hidden agenda of feminists, who think gender difference is the source of all injustice.
Most people don't realize that the feminist movement literally is Communist in origin. Most of the leading feminist thinkers, including Betty Friedan and Simone de Beauvoir, were Marxists, and many also were lesbians.
Feminism is about power not choice. "No women should be authorized to stay at home and raise her children," said feminist founder Simone de Beauvoir. "Women should not have that choice, because if there is such a choice, too many women will make that one" (Saturday Review, June 14, 1975).
If feminism were really about choices, it would not indoctrinate women to enter the work force and become "independent." It would not demonize men and heterosexual love. It would not ostracize feminists who marry and start families.
Lesbians have always been women who coveted the male role. It is based on Marxist notions of "equality" and class conflict that have no relevance to a mystical and biological reality such as love.
The breakdown in the traditional family caused by feminism is the main reason for our social, personal and existential problems. People have always derived meaning and purpose from familial roles (e.g. daughter, wife, and mother) and from life-cycle rituals, (marriage, birth and death). Indeed, marriage and family are a God-given path to achieve love and personal fulfilment.
We do not find wholeness by incorporating masculine and feminine in ourselves but by uniting with our opposite. Heterosexual love is the attraction of opposites. Indeed, as heterosexuals we define ourselves in terms of these differences. If we are male, we are not female, and vice-versa, like dark and light. Because I denied these differences, I didn't know who I was. I didn't understand women, and I didn't know how to approach them.
I was almost 50-years-old before I solved the riddle. A book The Flight from Woman (1964) by Karl Stern, a Canadian psychiatrist, confirmed what my instincts were saying. My mother had been right all along. A man makes the house; the woman makes the home.
According to Stern, masculinity is defined by "power" over the natural and social environment. Men provide the physical and cultural context for the domestic world. They are do'ers: adventurers and builders, protectors and providers.
Femininity is defined by "love." Feminine psychology is founded on nurturing and loving husbands and children, and thereby being needed and loved. Women are the engines of love, acting much like the heart in the body. The family is the fundamental building block of society and foundry of the future. Women are its foundation.
Men define themselves by deeds; women simply are love: beauty, grace, faith and goodness. Men tend to be rational and objective; women subjective, intuitive and emotional. Distinctions like these need not constrict us. They are a theme upon which to play our own variations. For example, my wife mows the lawn; I do all the shopping and cooking. But without the theme, there is confusion and chaos.
The feminist gospel that traditional sex roles are "oppressive" is wrong. For many people, a flexible interpretation of traditional roles are essential for happiness and fulfilment.
I extrapolated from Karl Stern's distinctions. If man is motivated by power and woman by love, heterosexual love must be an exchange of the two.
A woman surrenders her power, in trust. This is how a woman expresses her love. By trusting. In this way, women actually empower men. If a man betrays this trust, he loses his power.
In return for her power, a woman gets what she really wants: a man's power expressed as his intense, undivided love.
He includes her in his sphere of self-interest: this is how two people become one. Her happiness is his happiness. He can't hurt her without hurting himself.
Teaching women to seek masculine power prevents them from getting what they really want. Women want to be possessed by a man's love.
God's love of Creation is mirrored in a man's love of a woman. A man channels God's love to a woman by making her a wife and mother. Women want masculine power, but it must be in a man.
A girlfriend once told me, "I want to be used." The same girlfriend also said that without a man, she feels "like a rudderless boat." Similarly, a man without a woman is a rudder without a boat.
A man cannot love a woman who is competing with him for power. Relationships between so-called "equals" are like mergers, or roommates.
Psychiatrist, Irene Claremont de Castillejo, calls them "brother-sister" marriages (Knowing Women: A Feminine Psychology, 1973).
They cannot achieve the intimacy as when a woman surrenders her will to a man, and a man returns this trust with his wholehearted love. Some psychiatrists say a woman's sexual satisfaction is also linked to her ability to trust and surrender.
Feminine women are creatures of God. In love, they sacrifice their "selves" for love, which in many religions is the key to transcendence. Helen Deutsch remarked on this"masochist-narcissist" syndrome (sacrifice for love) in her The Psychology of Women: A Psychoanalytic Interpretation (1944). The majority of women only achieve fulfilment as wives and mothers. In their hearts, they know it.
Nor can women love men with whom they compete. Women are hypergamous which means they seek men of higher status than themselves. Even the most ardent heterosexual feminist only can love someone more powerful than she.
The struggle for power is poisoning male-female relations. It is the death of love. Men cannot give up their defining characteristic (power) and expect to be men. Women cannot criticize and challenge men and expect to be loved.
When I comprehended this, I felt liberated. I established a healthy relationship with a woman who is my female complement, and married her.
The universal complaint is that men don't know how to be men; women don't know how to be women. It helps to see heterosexual love as a mystical dance. The male leads; the female follows. You can't have a graceful dance without each partner playing his part.
The dance is based on love. The male is always considering his mate's wishes because he loves her. In some cases, he will ask her to lead.
As in a ballroom dance, who can say which role is more important? Both partners are of equal value. The dance requires both the leadership and dynamism of the male; and the beauty, love and grace of the female.In the dance of love, two people become one, and the fruit of this mystical union, is often a child.--------
First Comment from Zahra:
I am a young girl of fifteen in England and I am very glad to have come across your website. It is a very informative read. I especially enjoy your articles on feminism. What I like about your website compared to other websites is the fact you don't demonize women or reduce them to sex and beauty the way others do. I feel...safe reading your things. You really ought to sell your ideas to schools (if you don't get arrested though!). I I am feeling conflicted; I want to study medicine when I'm older and find a cure for diseases but I also want to have children one day. Marriage won't be as much of a problem since i'd be getting an arranged marriage when i'm around twenty. I'm a second generation immigrant child who's parents spent their formative years in the UK so you'd have thought they'd at least understand the culture clash i'm going through. They don't but never mind. I was wondering what you might do in my situation.
Do you have the option of having your family first and then training afterward? If you do, that is the path I'd recommend.
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